I Never Thought

I never thought I would actually miss the shouts, the yells and the constant calling of my name. It has been over a month since we have kids in the school. I roam the halls in the uneasy silence and I don't relish the quiet. I actually miss noise.

I go outside to the playground and I don't marvel at the quiet beauty of the landscape and the singing of the birds. I miss the laughter, the shrieks and the calling of "Who wants to play grounders?"

Being in an empty school day in and day out for over a month is extremely eerie and unsettling. It takes an emotional toll on a person. You walk around thinking of the faces, voices and laughs that aren't there. You work hard to create bonds and relationships with kids and suddenly they are all gone and you are left wandering around and thinking of the memories.

Not in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would miss the constant calling of my name, but I do. I never imagined I would miss the sounds of children shrieking, but I do.

Over the years we end up taking so much for granted: the sound of laughter, the sound of kids having fun, the view of kids playing on a playground or having a soccer game. Now these have become memories. Memories of days that were once thought of mundane, repetitive, tiring, frustrating. I never thought I would long for those days to come back.

The days without kids are mundane, repetitive, tiring and frustrating. Joni Mitchell said it best with, "you don't know what you got till it's gone." COVID took away paradise and put up a metaphorical parking lot.

Someday the kids will be back and they will be them silly, wonderful selves and I will be able to blog all the hilarious and unexpected things that they do. That will be a wonderful day.

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